Ok. Maybe that’s a bit extreme. I’m not to clear on what exactly ‘Insomnia’ is anyway. But for some reason, I’ve woke up after less than an hours sleep, and having tried to get back to sleep for the last 2 hours… I’ve now decided to better use my time by sharing my concerning lack of Zzzz’ing with you blog readers.

What’s more concerning is that I have a meeting at 9 am … today. It’s currently 3am. 6 hours and counting, huh?

Ok. So, enough about lack of sleep and what not.

Colossians 1.15-17 says:

(Talking about the Supremacy of Christ…) “He is the image of the invisible God, the first born over all creation. For by Him all things were created: things on heaven and on earth, visable and invisable, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by Him and for Him. He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together.”

How awesome is that!?!?!

Psalm 33 says:

“By the word of the Lord were the heavens made, their starry host by the breath of His mouth.“

“For He spoke, and it came to be; he commanded  and it stood firm.” (talking about the earth)

“But the plans of the LORD stand firm forever, the purposes of His heart through all generations.”

Whooooooohoooooooo!

Isaiah 40 says:

“Lift your eyes and look to the heavens: Who created all these? He who brings out the starry host one by one, and calls them each by name. Because His great power, and mighty strength, not one of them is missing.“

“The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth, He will not grow tired or weary, and His understanding no-one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.”

It all blows my MIND! My God is a star breathing God!!!!! He’s a universe creator. He’s HUGE! And He has authority over ALL creation. God created us. He saved us. It’s like… wow. He holds us together. And it’s in Him we can put our hope… because he’s a faithful God - a God who gives us strength when we are weak and tired. He’s a mysterious God - we can’t even begin to understand Him - but I take confidence in the fact that He IS in control. His plans stand firm forever, and His purpose comes to pass.
What an awesome God…
Night.

I found a post-it in a page of my journal today which I can’t remember putting there. It says :

Jealousy is a type of fear. It is about being afraid you are going to lose someone you love.

This pretty much got me thinking about Jealousy, what it is, etc, etc. And I came up with this:

• Jealousy typically refers to the thoughts, feelings, and behaviors that occur when a person believes a valued relationship is being threatened by a rival. This rival may or may not know that he or she is perceived as a threat.

Ok. So before I get overrun with comments/e-mails for trying to justify jealousy… I’m going to clarify something. For the sake of this blog, there are two types of jealousy. ‘Freaky insane jealousy’. And what I’m going to refer to as ‘Biblical Jealousy’.

It links in quite well with Idolatry. You see it in the 10 Commandments (Exodus 20:1-17; Deuteronomy 5:6-21) when God says:

(2) I am the LORD your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery. (3) You shall have no other gods before me. (4) You shall not make for yourselves an idol in the form of anything in heaven above or on the earth beneath or the waters below. (5) You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the LORD your God, am a jealous God.“

Exodus 20: 2-5

Ok. See, because God LOVES YOU… he is jealous. What he’s saying here is that he brought ‘you’ out of egypt for you to worship HIM. There’s not supposed to be anyone or anything else. There’s just Him, and you worship Him alone!

I understand God’s jealousy. Or I think I do at least. Of course I’m going to be jealous if I walk in and my girlfriend is acting in a way she shouldn’t be with some other guy. Of course I’m going to be jealous if I know she’s spending more time with some ‘other guy’ than she is with me. It’s because I love her.

Of course your wife/husband is going to be jealous if you’re meeting with your x-girlfriend/boyfriend on a regular basis. It’s because she/he loves you.

It’s the same thing when God is Jealous of the Israelites going around worshipping other gods and idols. Of course He’s going to be Jealous when the Israelites spend more time in sin and idolatry than they do worshipping him.

I don’t know. That’s what I’d call ‘Biblical jealousy’.

Just wait till you see my blog on ‘Freaky insane jealousy’…

I got back from Poland on Monday, and to be honest, I didn’t want to leave.

Not only did I make a bunch of new friends, and meet a whole load of people - but I saw a difference in kid’s lives from the year before, I saw God moving, I watched Satan attempt to interfere in what we were doing, and I saw a nation in desperate need of a Saviour.

‘Impact Poland’ is an English Youth camp, where over the course of a week, they get to practice and learn more English - with classes such as music, English conversation, sports, arts and crafts, and film making. The whole week has a Christian message behind it, and through the relationships we had with the young people, it was our aim to show them God’s love.

Pre-Poland… I wasn’t interesting in being there. To be honest, I wasn’t feeling particularly enthusiastic about teaching music and singing to a bunch of Polish Kids (70). Boy… did that change.

Poland is pretty much a Roman Catholic nation through and through. That became apparent when I visited the 7th Largest ‘church’ in Europe - a Cathedral that was built by instruction of ‘Mary’, for Mary. Anything sound ‘wrong’ with that?

—————————– rant begins——————————————

What enraged me was the fact that Mary was the centre of everything. Now where, in the bible does it say ‘Worship Mary!’ or ‘Pray to/through Mary’. Nowhere! This place had Mary above Jesus, and God. This place had Mary, with a smaller, less glorious image of Jesus and/or God off to one side, or in a corner some where. This place had Scripture such as “I AM WHO I AM” beside Mary, as if she was the Great ‘I AM’. This place had “Come to me all who are thirsty” beside Mary, as if she was the one who said it, as if she was the one to be worshipped, as if she was… God.

There’s nothing I hate more than Idol worship and stuff that God makes clear in the bible that he doesn’t like. (and that’s putting it lightly).

People where kneeling before paintings and statues. People where worshipping something/someone who WAS NOT God.

These people clearly had religion, and they clearly had no living relationship with God.

I just don’t understand how a ‘faith’ that basis it’s religion on the bible, could go so completely off the track. This isn’t some misinterpretation we’re talking about here… this is complete off-the-rail, wrong direction, God abhors stuff.

—————————– rant over——————————————

Anyway…

It was amazing to see young people who the previous year had no relationship with God, actually participating in our ‘Missions team’ meetings. It was amazing to see young people from my music class last year performing Christian worship songs that I had taught them last year. It was amazing to see young people take bibles home with them. It was amazing to see young people come to ‘Church’ (non-Idol worshipping, Bible following, Jesus loving, God fearing Church). It was amazing having conversations about God. It was freaking awesome to have the young people on the missions team declare that they wanted to get stuck into their bible, and get to know it.

Not only did this camp allow us as a team to witness and represent God to a large group of young people, but it developed a whole bunch of young leaders who want to run the race as if to win - who want to pursue God with all they have.

I’m amazed at what God has done this year at Impact Poland. I’m excited about what He’s going to continue to do. I praise God for moving in the lives of the young people, both Polish and on the missions team. PRAISE GOD!

On Friday I leave for Poland (again!). Four of us from Re:Hope are going on mission to an English camp that we were involved in last year. To be honest, I’m not overly excited.

I know once I’m there that’ll be a different story however. There’s just a bit of prayer required.

This year I’ll be doing music with the Kids. It’s pretty fun. They tend to get pretty ‘into’ it.

We’ll be having a Christian message throughout the week, and will be representing God to the kids… pray that we’re authentic representatives.

I’m excited about Re:Hope right now. I’m excited for what God has got planned for us as a church.

We’re in a building which isn’t ours on paper - but I believe it’s where God wants us to be.

We’re situated pretty near to the University of Glasgow - and I believe it’s where God wants us to be.

The building is owned by a couple who are getting divorced - we’re praying they come to know Jesus, and that their marriage is saved - I’m confident that God will move.

We’re in a building which could easily seat 500… and I believe it’s going to be filled.

Just wait and see…

One thing that I’ve found difficult is to seperate my work (for Re:Hope Next Generation Bible Church) from my personal one-on-one time with God. It made me thing about what it is to work ‘for God’. And how to ’serve’ simply isn’t enough.

Here’s what I’m getting at…

God didn’t save us to serve. That would imply that God needed or required us. Which I find hard to believe. In fact, that’s a nice way of saying it… I just plain and simple don’t believe it.

I had a conversation with a friend over MSN Instand messanger last night, and I asked her, ‘Why did God save us?’.

“Because He loves us”

God didn’t save us to serve him. He doesn’t require that from us. God is all powerful, remember? He’s Glorious with or without us anyway. He saved us for Sonship and to worship Him. (Check out Paul Washer on Youtube).

Makes sense right?

I wasn’t saved to serve. I wasn’t saved because God required something I had to offer. I wasn’t saved because I’m extreamly good-looking… ONLY KIDDING! I was saved because yes, God loves me, and yes he wants for me to be his son, and to worship him and to love him like the almighty father He is.

Sonship is different from Serving. And working for a church, or as a missionary isn’t ‘enough’. You’re a son or a daughter of God, not an employee. The son/daughter element of your relationship with God is still required no matter how many hours you put in ‘working for God’.

It’s bible week this week at Re:Hope.

Basically, starting 9am this morning, or yesterday morning now actually… we read through the whole of the bible outloud in the church building, hoping to have read all of it come Friday. It’s brilliant.

Today I wasn’t even reading, but it was awesome to hear the Word of God being read alound ALL day long. It’s just… good.

Bible readthrough - You should try it sometime. It’s lifechanging.

- Mark

God, You search me and You know me. You know me better than I know myself. You know my past, my present, and my future. You know when I sit and when I rise. You know my weaknesses and my strengths. You know the areas in which I stumble. You know where I fail. You know my heart, God.

God, I seek You. I want to see Your face, God. I want to know Your ways, God. I want You more than this world. I want Your ways before my own. Your ways are higher. You are greater than me. You’re completely more than me. You’re different from me God.

You, God… didn’t save me to be a servant. You saved me for sonship. I worship You God, for saving me. I praise You for saving me from my sins, and saving me from DEATH, and eternity in hell. I thank you and praise You for the cross. Don’t let me forget. Don’t let me skip over the cross.

God, I praise You for being the victor! I take confidence in the fact that the victory is already WON! I take confidence in the fact that You are living and active God. I take confidence in the fact that You move just as much today as You moved any other time, God. I pray in a confidence that You still answer prayer. That when I pray and cry out to You God - You hear me. You see me God.

God, all I need is You. All I need is YOU, God!

What can wash away my Sins? Nothing but the blood of Jesus! What can make me whole again, Nothing but the blood of Jesus!

You amaze me God. Your mercy and grace. Your love and kindness. Your patience, and Your righteous anger. God, you astound me. I can’t get over the fact that You take interest and care for someone as lowly as me. I am the cheapest of all sinners, I am the lowest of the low, God. And You saved me!

I pray God, for people who are hurting God. That they would remember You’re the God of comfort, and the God who created love… and a God who provides shelter from the storm. That thay would know that they can seek You and You will hear them God. That when they cry out - You hear. You answer.

God, forgive my sins. Forgive me when I don’t live the life I’m called to live. Forgive me for not seeking You in all things. Forgive me for not remembering the cross. Forgive me for following the world and living by the world’s standards before Your’s. Forgive me for not living according to Your word.

God, I am nothing; I’m no one; I AM broken and hopeless, and ruined WITHOUT You. Don’t allow me think otherwise. Don’t allow me to believe I know better than my God. Don’t allow me to put my plans before Your’s.

I pray for the addicts and the escapists. I pray that they stop running from their paid and their hurt and their problems. I pray that instead of running they seek You. That they FIND You. I pray for Godly encounters, Father. I pray they the church finds itself overrun with new comers, and the homeless. I pray You’d prepare us for revival, Father. That You’d prepare us to council the broken. I pray that You’d break us, God - in order that we would know You better.

God, don’t let us become comfortable with where we’re at. Don’t let us become lazy followers of You. Don’t let us forget what You’ve done in our lives. Don’t let us forget that Jesus died for our sins. Don’t let us forget that He overcame death and Sin, in order for us to be saved. Don’t let us forget that he hung on a cross for US. Don’t let us forget that he rose again. Don’t let ME forget any of it God.

Father, I couldn’t honestly spend enough time with You in prayer.

I pray in the Name of Jesus, and in the knowledge that he mediates for me, God…

Amen.

I clearly haven’t blogged in awhile…

In fact, I think people have even noticed… especially Kirsty Mac (my #1 blog fan).

Rest assured that I haven’t in fact ceased to have any inspiration re: my blog… and I’ve got a whole pile of stuff that I do intend to blog about - I’ve just not got round to it yet.

Give it a few days…